The problem of NO. The power of NO.

Does it ever get easier to say no?

Does it ever get easier to say no? If it does, is that right? It should always be hard to say no for the right reasons. I like to think that for 99% of requests it will be a yes unless its no. I work hard with staff to try and find solutions creatively to allow their requests to take place. Of course there are some requests that just cannot be met because there is too great an impact on the service to the young people, but they may be mostly met or part met to everyone’s satisfaction.

Squashing an enthusiastic member of staff with a potentially great idea is hard because they haven’t looked at the wider impact, but I have tried to follow some general guidelines about saying no.

·         I genuinely know instantly whether I want to say yes or no to a request.

·         Sometimes when I cannot say no directly I have found a way of saying it indirectly but this has taken practise and knowing my colleague

Other sources of advice have helped me too;

·         Say no for yourself rather than referring to a higher authority or circumstances beyond your control

·         If you’re not sure then ask for some specific information so that you know exactly what you are committing yourselves to

·         When you say no to something you don’t want to do you are saying yes to yourself and your own importance

·         The skill of self-disclosure is a big help in saying no

·         Saying no and surviving the guilt gets easier

The most important bit of advice given to me was;

·         To make sure that you are refusing the request and not rejecting the person, the role, the job or the friendship

Recent things I have said no to:

A business studies trip to Amsterdam. Allowing a member of staff to attend an external course with some prolific speakers because it was felt that our in house knowledge and practice was equal/up to speed.

 
I have said yes to a holocaust CPD event for two staff with a view of a future visit to Auschwitz!